Living In-Between
I’m not a fan of “in-between,” but frankly, who is? We’ve been in-between for a while now. Circumstances in our life interrupted our momentum and left us stuttering and sputtering trying to gain traction again.
Yesterday, I wandered into a Dollar Tree store in Mountain Home, ID looking at Fall decorations. As I perused these wonders, I almost talked myself out of them.
“You’re in a temporary home.”
“You’re only here for a few weeks.”
“Will there be room in your suitcase when you leave?” (That last one is ALWAYS the real question.)
I stood in the store and could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I. DON’T. WANT. TO. KEEP. LIVING. LIKE. THIS. Always measuring. Constantly considering.
“It’s a DOLLAR TREE for crying out loud, Pam! Buy the decorations! Buy ALL the decorations, if you want! What? You’ll be out $10?!?!” I shouted to myself.
A lady with swirled hair and bedazzled jacket pushed past me with her cart. I could feel her eyes boring into the back of my head.
“Back off, lady! I’m doing serious life work here!” I thought. But instead I said, “Oh, sorry. Excuse me. Am I in the way?” as a good Christian ought.
Do I get the garland with acorns or squashes? Squash? Squashi? It’s the Dollar Tree. You don’t get both on one rope here. I put all of it in the cart.
I gathered a couple festive signs and a nice little block that said, “Thankful.” I chuckled and thought, “Too bad they don’t have what I’m really thinking on a plaque.” Something to the effect that says:
HERE’S A NICE LITTLE DECORATION THAT DOESN’T COME CLOSE TO CATCHING ALL THE EMOTIONS I’M FEELING IN THIS SEASON, BUT I’LL SETTLE FOR THE SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE PHRASE OF “THANKFUL.”
Maybe I’ll tweet Dollar Tree and offer suggested sayings for next year.
I came “home” to our AirBNB and immediately showed John my purchases. He smiled and watched me go to work removing tags and placing these new-found treasures around the house.
As I lit the Autumn-scented candle, a wave of contentment swept over me.
For this day…
For this moment…
I am content.
I still don’t have any definitive answers. We are waiting on Jesus.
I sit down and look at the “thankful” block now festooned with squash and acorns.
I am thankful. Thankful that in the in-between, we can trust. Thankful that there is no “middle ground” for Jesus. He is in all. He sees all. He is all. So on these days that I’m pleading for a map, I’ll put my hand in His and trust the Guide.
“Be strong and brave. Do not be afraid. Do not lose hope. I am the Lord your God. I will be with you everywhere you go.” Joshua 1:9.
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8 Comments
So good, Pam! Fuels my desire to hold you closer in prayer! God bless.
September 4, 2019
Thank you, Dear Sandy! I so appreciate you!
September 4, 2019
Love it and you!!!
September 4, 2019
Thank you, Jeanne! Praying for your “middle ground” now. Praying peace surrounds you and Danny.
September 4, 2019
This so resonates with me. There will be no weighing of suitcases in heaven! ❤️ Thanks for sharing!
September 4, 2019
Yes, thank the Lord, NO SUITCASES IN HEAVEN!
September 5, 2019
You are such a gifted writer, Pam! It is a reminder to me that, even in the most mundane, God is with us and loves us. By the way, this is the second time I am having to type this because I got my “captcha” wrong (I said 3 x 3 = 3. Ha! Must need more coffee!)
September 6, 2019
Thanks, Stan. Brother Andrew says, “Every little thing for God.” I’m trying to keep that in mind when attempting to conquer the whole world. 🙂
September 6, 2019